why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
