I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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