New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Randomize
