That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize