There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
