SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
