im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
This is my gift to your gina
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
