Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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