Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
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