these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
