You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
The power of my boobs compel you
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
