He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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