Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I just found puke in my bra..
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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