i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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