THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
