My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Gay?
German.
Pity.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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