May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
