after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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