Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
