I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
