fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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