So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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