hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Quick, to the slutcave!
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
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