There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize