The brown eye won't let me do that either.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
