I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
