Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
