I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
