he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
