My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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