Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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