Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
