So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
