fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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