I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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