Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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