Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
