Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
