Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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