Someone shit on the floor
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
The struggles of a small town man whore
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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