More tranny stories later!
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
