I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
