Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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