Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
