Just fell off a train. Bad.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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