She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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