I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
