He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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