But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
