Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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